Keeping it light today. It’s another snowy day. And I’m fast running out of storage. For the snow that just keeps falling. So I’m giving the shovel a day off and inviting it inside to groove to some of my favorite tunes on my playlist. Continue reading “Time For Some Ear Porn”→
[Author’s Note: I usually embrace humor in my writing. Because who doesn’t love a good snort of ginger ale up their nose? This is a serious piece about my emotional state, past and present. You don’t need to read it. But I so needed to write it.]
I’ve lived my entire life in a part of the world where there is serious winter weather.
And somehow over the years, I’ve managed to convince myself that the six months of lovely, warm, for a few days smoking hot, with an acceptable number of sunny days, weather that arrives in May and lasts through to October (sometimes November) is worth the misery of the other five to six months when it’s cold and windy and snow arrives weekly. Continue reading “I Don’t Like This. Can We Stop Now?”→
The Assignment: Interview with a Halloween celebrity (originally published on Long Awkward Pause and reposted here because I can) The Subject: The Master, from the hit television series — Buffy, The Vampire Slayer The Interviewer: Me (blood type: AB-negative — Just. In. Case.)
I couldn’t line up a monster who walks by day. Sunny sidewalk café, glass of wine, a little Brie. Scads of people…lovely. He had to be a vampire who lives at the ass end of nowhere. And now I’m lost. And late. And talking to myself. I wonder if I’m dressed right? Turtle-neck, thick scarf, necklace of garlic, holy water blessed by the homeless guy with the Praise Jesus sign. He looked like he knew what he was doing with his hands waving across his chest, screaming “Holy Mother of God!” every few minutes. Okay, stop. Take a breath. Here’s the street and there’s his house. Holy shit, nice digs…wonder who did his landscaping? Right. Park and get out. Out. Out of the car. Fuck, you’re not scared, are you? Stop talking to yourself and move it.
Master: Sweetie! You’re running a bit late but not to worry, I’m serving up a little something in the sitting room. Straight through and to your left. May I take your…wrap?
BD: Oh, please! (No. NO! Remember the neck.) Actually, no, I’ll keep the scarf. Sorry I’m late.
Master: We have all night. Are you sure I can’t take your…wrap? I keep it quite warm.
BD: [firmly grasps scarf] I’m good. Fine. Lead the way!
[sound of footsteps]
BD: I like your furniture. Not sure about all the white…
Master: The covers are removable. Makes for easy cleaning. Please, sit. Glass of wine? I’m afraid I only drink red…room temperature.