TEN Reasons Numbered Posts Are So Yesterday

Who doesn’t love making a list then ticking it off, or as I like to do, getting out a ruler and drawing a nice, neat line right through the middle. Twice.

When did numbered lists become the Kanye of blog posts?

Numbered lists seem to be the itemized notes de jour of online media.

Everywhere you go, someone’s put together a “Reasons Why” or “How To” or “Must Have” list that features numbers. It’s like they’re saying you’re a bad person if reading 106 ways to flambé a chicken is NOT the most important thing you’ll do all day. Too much choice, like too much of anything, is harmful to your (mental) health.

I’m confused enough deciding what side to part my hair in the mornings.

Where I Get Serious For Once

After yesterday’s post on inspirational quotes and images, I decided to get on the meme bus and learn how to make my own.

I bet you’re expecting some highly sarcastic, acerbic, slightly offensive words of wit accompanying an image of Karl Urban* in a suit. Or naked.

WRONG! I win! 

The Search For My Words

I’ve been a blog-lite blogger lately. Oh, yeah. And by “lite” I mean about 1000 miles away from being motivated to move fingers over my keyboard.

Having your marriage shit-canned by a bad guy douchebag can have that affect on a person. But, hey! On the plus side, he’s now someone else’s problem.

But it’s been hard, sitting at my laptop to have this happen:

[blank…blank…blank…repeat]

Do Not Lick A Metal Object Today

The great debate of winter. Do you prefer cold or snow? 

2016: My Year Of Hella No

What. A. Year. It began with a man I loved and a three month trip to Italy.

It ended with me finding out the man I loved is a lying cheater with no soul. Oh, and dead eyes. (I just realized this as I was writing this post.) A man who came with me on that trip to Italy just so he could “hook up” with the wife of a couple we met on our first trip to Italy. After a year and a half of sexting, and texting, and secret emails, and private Skype calls, I finally found out what was going on and he’s no longer part of my life.

(I’ll wait while you scrape off that mental layer of eww.)

Nearly Wordless Wednesday

I like words. A lot. Some words I like better than others. Some words I use every day. Some words only come out for special occasions. Some words I tire of easily.

I’m thinking of some one word in particular right now. 

And sometimes, words written by someone else? They totally float my canoe.

Got a quote that saw you through a tough time? Or made you laugh? I can use either or both. *grin*

Women Are Going Under The Knife For Better Toe Cleavage — It’s Time To Get A Foot Up On Body Dysmorphic Disorder

Feet. They carry us everywhere.

To work, to play, to the liquor store for vodka. To bed. To the bathroom. Into your lover’s arms. Away from the dentist chair.

Running, screaming, from your mother-in-law.

The size of your feet doesn’t matter. Or does it? If you suffer from body dysmorphic disorder (BDD), focusing on what’s wrong, instead of what’s right with your body, takes up most of your waking moments. There have been any number of articles written on body image issues. Too big, too small, too fat, too thin, too short, too tall. Pick a body part and I can guarantee there are women now looking in a mirror not liking what they see. The latest body part seems to be feet.

Not everyone is happy with the state of their two mobility devices and will try anything to improve on what nature gave them. We all agree that severe bunions or clawed toes can hamper our happy walk. There are surgical ways to ease those problems.

Tourists say the darndest things!

Blogdramedy here reporting “live” from the sunny east coast of Sicily. When did backpacks become the go-to travel accessory of over 65-year olds? Why do the packs never match what they are wearing? Do they know they’re all hunched over like Quasimodo?

It makes my brain hurt.

Against all odds, NWR (The Nudge Wink Report) management approved my travel request but, so far, are refusing to cover the cost of all this in-depth investigative snooping. I’m starting to think they just wanted me out of the office.

But forget that. Let’s run through the checklist:

Hung over? No.
Getting enough sleep? Yes.
Too much coffee? Never.
Freaking out about eruptions from Mount Etna? Ever so slightly.
Embarrassed by fellow tourists? Of course.

A Hashtag to love this Valentine’s Day

This is a rare occurrence for me. Two posts in one day. But it IS Valentine’s Day and if you can’t pull another post out of your bum, especially when it’s about what you love, on this day of all days, you need to put down that box of chocolates and join in.

Hippie Cahier sent out a Tweet asking if I wanted to join in with a free-write via Susie Lindau’s blog: take ten minutes, make a list of things you love and share it. Tell it. Scream it to the world. Okay, maybe not scream but perhaps in your “loud talker” voice. 

Just Another Day In The Blog Leagues

It’s happened to all us writers. The thing we fear most. Next to writer’s block and running out of vodka.

A typo in your shiny new post.

Even if you’re at the top of your blogging game, you can’t expect to pitch perfect every time you hit the field. I hear having a ritual helps.

What my face looks like when I see a typo.

Not changing your socks is big with some people. In the movie “Bull Durham” the character of Ebby Calvin ‘Nuke’ LaLoosh is convinced engaging in a little nookie would put the jinx on his fastball. I could do that. Better than giving up FRESH socks.