Blogging, Humor

Just Another Day In The Blog Leagues

It’s happened to all us writers. The thing we fear most. Next to writer’s block and running out of vodka.

A typo in your shiny new post.

Even if you’re at the top of your blogging game, you can’t expect to pitch perfect every time you hit the field. I hear having a ritual helps.

tim-robbins
What my face looks like when I see a typo.

Not changing your socks is big with some people. In the movie “Bull Durham” the character of Ebby Calvin ‘Nuke’ LaLoosh is convinced engaging in a little nookie would put the jinx on his fastball. I could do that. Better than giving up FRESH socks.

Not everyone is looking to score large in the blog leagues. Some of us are happy slogging along with our blog. Day in and day out, defying the blank page and making sure our SEO stratagem is optimal. (What does that even mean?)

Then the day arrives when you’re on the mound white-knuckling your post to publish and it happens.

You spot a typo. Maybe even more than one.

Of course, this is after you proofed your piece at least three times and it’s been “live” for half the day. While you were off gleefully reading and commenting on your favorite blogs, this little bugger was sitting there all smug, nudging the correctly spelled words on either side — LIKE HE BELONGED.

hercules-hades-gifWhat’s the first thing you do? After the echoes fade and the air goes from blackest blue to a smokey haze, you march him off the field and back to the dugout. Then you frantically read through your comments to see if anyone spied the intruder and was kind enough to politely point out the error. This results in one of two reactions:

1. Sigh in relief that it’s one of your regular readers and they are so apologetic about pointing out the typo you want to reach out and hug them.

2. Start frothing at the mouth because not one of your readers noticed and you become overly emotional, spiral out of control, and vow never to darken the door of the written word again.

That second reaction is a bit extreme but we’re talking sneaky typo. They love to get under your skin and fester. Either way, with a blog you can slide to home plate knowing there’s some distance between you and your readers. They’re not actually in the room coughing politely and pointing.

This realization provides some measure of relief until the other side of your brain — the evil side — decides to join the conversation.

Remember that time back when you were working for the communications department and you were in the middle of a power point presentation? Remember what happened? Do you remember getting to the section on public consultation and you standing there in your power suit with your laser pointer grasped in your slightly sweaty hand because this was your first time talking in front of a group of your coworkers? Remember what happened? No? Lucky for you I remember.

You can guess what happened. How many words can you spell with the letters p-u-b-l-i-c if you leave out the letter l? Go ahead and sound it out. You know you want to.

P-U-B-I-C and that spells pubic.

That was a gold-star, blue-ribbon, belly churning moment and saved only because the room was full of men who had the good grace not to laugh in my face — not one of them my boss.

They waited until the staff barbecue and the annual “empower employees” motivational slide show, where my gaffe took center stage.

By then it was funny.

Ever experience an embarrassing typo? Please share. 

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18 thoughts on “Just Another Day In The Blog Leagues”

  1. Here’s a typo near-miss. I suppose technically it wouldn’t have been a typo, since as I medical editor I was supposed to type what I heard verbatim. So what, exactly, would be the polite version of “full of pus” or “pus emanating from,” anyway? Because what he said was “pussy.”

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  2. You put “pubic” on an official, running with the big dogs, business presentation? And lived? You’re my hero!

    Had I spotted the typo, I would have told you. I think you’re overestimating how smart your readers are. We isn’t.

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  3. I use a text reader to edit most blogs. Still, “an” vs. “and” vs.. “an” slip by me (as well as “with “substituted for “when”).

    The most embarrassing typo I’ve witnessed was when I lived in California and worked for a state agency. An email went out to EVERY employee with 1 typo on it that happened to be in the subject line(we’re talking 5 figures here). Instead of saying “clients are now consumers” it said “clients are not consumers.” That was more than a teaspoon of humiliation for the person who sent out the email. 🙂

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    1. I don’t think “whoops” covers this one. It seems to be the little words that end up kicking us in the butt. We can all spell Chrysanthemum (it might take a moment to sound it out) and there’s auto-correct but you’re right…sometimes the shorter the word, the bigger the typo. *grin*

      Liked by 1 person

  4. One way to avoid typo identification is to put a photo of some guy in a jock strap or mesh underwear in the post. Women will enjoy the beefcake and skip spell checking, men will scroll to get the offending image off the screen. I’m guessing you may have already figured that out.

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  5. LOL… PUBIC… *giggles like a 13 yr old*… OMG I proof my posts a zillions times, then I hit publish, then I go back and read them on the main page a half a zillion times and it’s almost guaranteed that I find something. I’m like “dude how the hell did you miss that, you proofed it a zillion and a half times!”

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    1. Typos are nasty little buggers and they show up EVERYWHERE. And sometimes when you least expect. We’re all “proof” that we’re not perfect. If it’s for a client, I’ll read it backwards. If it’s for my blog, I’ll proof it a few times and it’s done like dinner.

      Does that make me lazy? I certainly hope so. *lays down for another nap*

      Liked by 1 person

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